Hello there LazyTalkers you bunch of ‘orrible creatures. Just wanted to chat about the nominees for that boring party they call the Brit Awards – which by the way I will be attending. Suited and booted, little after party on a boat, and the band on the boat will be a group called Chic. Who cares, normal? This is nothing.
Heres my predictions and hopes innit:
- Best Producer – Got to be Paul Epworth for me, he does Adeles stuff and shes mint.
- British Breakthrough Act – Go on London Grammer, I would say Disclousure but reckon they’ve already broken alot of bits and bobs.
- International Solo Female Artist – Who cares, I thought it was the ‘Brits’ as in BRITish
- International Group – Same rule applies mate, but I think if I was pushed to choose, like reaaally pushed I think Daft Punk will take it.
- British Femal Solo Artist – I like Laura Marling, shes a lovley girl with a heart of gold, deserves everthing that comes her way, she wont fuckin’ win it though.
- British Group – Rudimental all the way! I kick about with them sometimes so I know they can make fuckin’ big tunes and party like 1984.
- International Solo Male Artist – Nah.
- Bristish Male Solo Artist – Give it to David Bowie. I fucking dare you, you square.
- Bristish Single – Rudimental boys.
- Mastercard Album of the year – I gotta say Rudimental again. But if they lose I dont mind seeing it go to Artic Monkeys. Those lads are gents, used to kick around with the drummer up north smoking pippys and drinking lightning.
Gotta dash, theres been a pile up on the A40 and people need cabs.
so I got three guitars in my house and I play them all the time, I wrote half these songs on them..
BUT i have never played guitar at a gig… in front of an audience that is!
Im toying with the idea cos you see we got some songs and I been playing em in rehearsal
Anyway Im gonna have a go for Marc’s gig I think… we got this new song called Make You Mine and I pretty much play the whole first verse, so to play it.. I got to play it.
I got get this first gig under my belt and then I might start to play a few more.
If i fuck up… go easy at me.
Ah fuck throw a pint at me, ill soon sort it out If I dont come correct.
See you wednesday.
Ps I wonder If Bobby Bear is coming…
Hello people of Now,
So 2014 kicked off in some style for us Lazytalkers.. We played to a packed room of paralletic 2014 enthusiasts who looked ready to party like its was 1939. (summit about a dress code)
I arrived first at the pub where I found Tag running around stuffing money and drinks tokens into envelopes while directing a red faced boy who looked about 16 to single handedly prepare the pub for the imminent and sold put Railway NYE party. The Railway btw is the pub Tag lives above and apparently is employed by to do something… we still not sure what.
As the boys turned up one by one to find out that of course….. we could of turned up two hours later than EXPLICITLEY BLOODY REQUESTED to soundcheck as nothing was ready and the sound guy had never even been to the pub let alone done the sound before. We loitered around shoving furniture into dark corners and asking Tag for drinks tokens… while an 8 year old girl called Ruby drew pictures of various members of the band.
Eventually after much rearranging we managed a 15 min soundcheck (longer than we would normally bother with) we played a bit of Luzaville, Our new single Just A Ride and then that was it.
6 hours to kill before were on in a pub where the drinks are free and its NYE..
6 hours later… the pub is ridiculously rammed, The Skanx (on before us) get the people dem going with some tight Reggae ska complemented by their lovely brass section while Dave ‘the rave’ Gamble whips up the crowd with his party selection eventually entering 2014 after a slightly (as always) confusing/sudden countdown with Young Hearts Run Free by Lazytalk favourite Candi Staton and were off..
After a lot of ‘where’s Tag?’ ‘when we going on?’ ‘lets get this fucking over with!!’
We head on stage… our usual opener – The dancehall inspired ‘STyle gets the girls at the front winding up there bellies and all that and the tone is set.
while the whole pub seems to be jumping to the same beat.
we rattle through Adverts, I Wanna Know and crowd favourite Memories before dropping Hotstepper. Tag is winding his bass, jack is loving it, josh is in his own world and sam is shouting at everyone most of the time but nobody really cares..
Ermm.. its all a bit of a blur after that really. We end on Keep Ya Head and I stumble out the front for some fresh air and the night has barely begun…….
I wish there were more picture but everyone was clearly more concerned with drinking 2013 into oblivion than taking stupid photos
Up yours Instagram…
(only joking) do follow our Instagram.
Mister P (under a duvet somewhere north of the river)
Oi Oi, went round to see the Joe the Flo last night with Sam… we spent the evening singing and arguing over who’s turn it is to play the guitar. Joe was quoting Descartes… as usual. Sam was babbling away. It was fun. We saw this guy passed out at the table in McDonalds on Chapel Market.. BigMac overdose? Who knows….
X Factor / James Arthur
So we all heard about that singer James Arthur; who won the X factor or should I call it LOLZ Factor? He’s been called the ‘biggest bell-end in pop’ I think that’s being a bit kind. Don’t get me wrong the geezer’s got a good voice but bruv, stop rapping and doing Fire In The Booth at 1xtra. Have you seen it, I couldn’t watch it, I was cringing so hard I pulled a muscle in my lower back. Proper convulsing…. Any way he tweeted Frankie Boyle saying “I feel sorry for you kids” and my boy (old friend of my actually) replied saying “I feel sorry for your kids who will be having to watch you do panto next Christmas.” Thanks Frankie, you still got it.
Off for a steak an’ ale-
Recently an old pal of mine Nigella Lawson has been getting a bit of stick in the newspaper. Now when I used to roll around with Nigella in the late 80’s, it was one of the best times of my life. We used to have massive cooking benders, staying up for nights at a time coming up with new recipes and making mental sangers. I will never forget when we boiled a ham in cocacola, she was an animal. Beast in the kitchen and a monster in the bedroom. Too far?
Lovin’ your work bird-
Welcome to Bobby’s Blog!
Girls and Boys,
Come here and find out about Bobby’s antics, wild escapades and lairy, hairy lifestyle. Word to yo’ mamma